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There are several reasons why support may not be effective. One possible reason is that receiving help could be a blow to self-esteem. A recent study by Christopher Burke and Jessica Goren at Lehigh University examined this possibility. According to the threat to self-esteem model, help can be perceived as supportive and loving, or it can be seen as threatening if that help is interpreted as implying incompetence. According to Burke and Goren, support is especially likely to be seen as threatening if it is in an area that is self-relevant or self-defining — that is, in an area where your own success and achievement are especially important. Receiving help with a self-relevant task can make you feel bad about yourself, and this can undermine the potential positive effects of the help. For example, if your self-concept rests, in part, on your great cooking ability, it may be a blow to your ego when a friend helps you prepare a meal for guests because it suggests that you're not the master chef you thought you were. Seunghyeon takes great pride in being the top math student in his class. His self-concept is deeply tied to his mathematical ability. When his friend Jimin offers to help him solve a difficult calculus problem before the final exam, Seunghyeon feels uncomfortable and irritated rather than grateful. He thinks to himself, "Does she think I can't handle this on my own?" " However, the very next day, when another friend offers to help him pick out a birthday gift for his mother — an area Seunghyeon doesn't particularly care about — he gladly accepts the help and feels perfectly at ease. Taein: Looking at Seunghyeon's reaction, aI think he felt threatened by Jimin's help offer because math is a self-defining area for him - his identity is closely tied to his mathematical ability, and receiving help in that area was like being told he isn't as good as he thinks. Seoyul: I agree. bAnd according to , help is always perceived as threatening no matter what area it is offered in, so Seunghyeon would have felt just as uncomfortable if someone had helped him choose a birthday gift. Taein: That's a good point. cThe reason Seunghyeon felt uncomfortable is that he interpreted Jimin's offer as implying that he lacked competence in math - the very skill on which his self-concept rests. Seoyul: Right. dAnd notice how relaxed he was about receiving help with gift shopping. Since choosing gifts isn't central to his self-concept, the help didn't pose any threat to his self-esteem. Taein: Exactly. eSo in Seunghyeon's case, receiving help with gift shopping must have undermined the positive effects of the assistance, making him feel worse about his ability to choose gifts. Seoyul: fIn the end, what determines whether help feels threatening or supportive is solely the personality of the helper, not the area in which help is offered.

Nearly all companies include classic "tell me about yourself" job interviews as part of the hiring process, and many rely on these interviews alone to evaluate applicants. But it turns out that traditional interviews are actually one of the least useful tools for predicting an employee's future success. This is because interviewers often subconsciously make up their minds about interviewees based on their first few moments of interaction and spend the rest of the interview cherry-picking evidence and phrasing their questions to confirm that initial impression: "I see here you left a good position at your previous job. You must be pretty ambitious, right?" " versus "You must not have been very committed, huh?" " This means that interviewers can be prone to ignoring significant information that would clearly indicate whether this candidate was actually the best person to hire.

To make social media a positive part of your daily life, it is important to use it mindfully with some guidelines. Above all, don't let social media consume all your time and attention. A quick and easy way to do this is to set limits on your usage or take regular breaks from social media. This will free up your time and energy to engage in activities outside the online world. When you start to feel unpopular or inferior, remember that what you see online presents only the highlights of other people's lives and does not reflect their entire story. If you still feel envious, use that emotion as motivation that helps you with your personal growth. By following these rules, you can make the most of social media and feel more at ease in your digital interactions. Second, keep in mind that social media is a tool to network with others, not a platform for competition.

Interestingly, in nature, the more powerful species have a ① narrower field of vision. The distinction between predator and prey offers a clarifying example of this. The key feature that distinguishes predator species from prey species isn't the presence of claws or any other feature related to biological weaponry. The key feature is the ② position of their eyes. Predators evolved with eyes facing forward — which allows for binocular vision that offers ③ accurate depth perception when pursuing prey. Prey, on the other hand, often have eyes facing outward, ④ maximizing peripheral vision, which allows the hunted to detect danger that may be approaching from any angle. Consistent with our place at the top of the food chain, humans have eyes that face We have the ability to gauge depth and pursue our goals, but we can also miss important action on our periphery. depth perception: 거리 감각 ◆◆ periphery

Remember that patience is always of the essence. If an apology is not accepted, thank the individual for hearing you out and leave the door open for if and when he wishes to reconcile. Be conscious of the fact that just because someone accepts your apology does not mean she has fully forgiven you. It can take time, maybe a long time, before the injured party can completely let go and fully trust you again. There is little you can do to speed this process up. If the person is truly important to you, it is worthwhile to give him or her the time and space needed to heal. Do not expect the person to go right back to acting normally immediately. To make someone forgive us, another crucial aspect is to say that we understand their feelings. But sometimes we forget to do this. When we apologize, it's essential to make the other person feel like we understand how our actions hurt them. This can help them to forgive us. reconcile: 화해하다 Genuine apologies never contain the words "if" or "but. " For example, never say, "I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings," or "I apologize for being insensitive, but such-and-such happened earlier " When someone says those words, it makes the apology meaningless because they are trying to say that the mistake wasn't really their fault, or that the person they hurt was not really hurt. I've often heard people tell me, "I'm sorry if I came across too strong in what I said to you," or something similar; those apologies always felt half-hearted. half-hearted: 성의가 없는 <보기> Dear Friend, I am writing to express my sincere apologies for not making it to your birthday party last night. 1I'm sorry if my actions caused you pain and discomfort. I can only imagine how disappointed and angry you must feel. I know how much work you put into the party. You must have been wondering when I would show up and where I was. 2I'm sure people asked you where I was, and I feel terrible for putting you in such an awkward position. 3I understand that it may take time for you to forgive me and trust me again fully. 4I want you to know that I am willing to give you all the time and space you need. I value our relationship and do not want to lose it over my mistake. If there is anything that I can do to make things right, please do not hesitate to let me know. 5If you consider me as your best friend, I am confident that we can continue to spend time together as usual starting from now. I appreciate your understanding, and please know that I am genuinely sorry for my actions. Sincerely, Your Friend.